I really like this guy, we “dated” in college but it was the wrong timing. Anyway we’ve been out of school for 5 years now and still keep in contact. I really like him and he has all the qualities that I would want in a future husband, but I don’t know how he feels about me. I always think about him and haven’t seen him in over 3 years. We talk about having kids together all the time and how we want our family relationship to be. Here’s the kicker, we live in two different states, thousands of miles separate us. How do I tell him how I really feel?

It sounds like your situation is a little more straightforward than you would like to believe. You don’t have a romantic relationship with the guy you like and it doesn’t seem like you are making steps towards that. One thing you and women everywhere should realize is that talking is just talking. Don’t get yourself gassed up, because someone is telling you that you would make a great mother one day…that is a compliment, not a come-on.

If you two dated in college which was over 5 years ago, you haven’t seen this guy in 3 years, and by your own admission you don’t even know how he feels about you…then it’s pretty clear that he doesn’t have strong or possibly any feelings for you. Trust me, if he was seriously interested, he would’ve visited you by now or at least extended an invitation for you to visit him by this point.

With that said, since you have already put so much thought and emotion into this pseudo relationship, then you should definitely talk to him. Honestly tell him how you feel about him. After 5+ years of knowing each other and having at the very least a friendship, sugar coating isn’t necessary and is counterproductive. When you talk to him, speak with confidence and remain calm and collected. The last thing you want to do is come off as a little looney by being overly emotional. There is a chance that he just wants you to tell him how you feel about him and express that you want a relationship before he pursues you on a serious level. When he tells you about his feelings, don’t settle for ambiguous statements or vague promises…make sure you are a 100% clear on where he stands so you can either move forward with him or move on with your life.

Hope that helps!